SERBA SALAH

This is what I feel, everday. Yes, SERBA SALAH.Having a sibling that is always 'coloring' your life everyday, with their madness, annoying yet friendly, sometimes I thank God for having one, but sometimes I regret - why I must have one.

I might feel more peaceful without her, but lonely without her. I can laugh a lot because of her, but I can be mad and angry because of her - even get hurt.

There are some things I like about her, of course. But I can't remember in this kind of situation. Hah. Well, what I can remember now is the bad sides of her. Whenever we start to fight, I feel so pissed-off and also worried. She does this more than once - like after we fight, we separate from each other as I don't want to see her for a while and either does she. I continue with my 'chore' (read: online) and she goes into our bedroom. This is why I hate being in the same bedroom as her, she's so damn messy and I'm an organized person. We never have same thoughts about this one. And carry on, when she's in our room she might do something to my belongings, like hiding it somewhere or else - she's even once threw my diary into the rubbish bin. I felt so pissed-off. Even though I'm in really bad mood or really hating her until I wish I never have her, I never did that. Like throwing her belongings or else. (even now I'm worried, is she doing something to my things or not? well don't care. God knows everything.) 


But if I think about it one more time - I'll feel empty without her existance. Well, I can only think about this advantage, ONLY ONE?! Errr... All I can say now is: "Syukurilah apa yang ada.." <- I don't say this with pleasant. Sh*t.